A Note

Hi!

Since yesterday I have been reading and trying to comment at blogs…I have not been able to do at some of my regular reads, while at some others I could do without a hitch. I am not sure why; but thinking of it, I wouldn’t like to continue so- commenting at some and not doing at others.

So, until the time I am able comment at every blog that I read, I will not be commenting at any place. I shall continue to read and appreciate your works regularly.Hope you understand.

Happy Blogging and if, I could say, please do promote fellow bloggers,They are possibly here with dreams….Help them realise theirs, as you realise yours!

best wishes,
devika

JUST LIKE THAT

A short conversation the other day with a friend, who knows me for quite a long time and regularly reads my blogs ….She always has a hundred questions to ask, its almost like an interview, a friendly interview for that matter, and I can be ‘JUST LIKE THAT’…and hence I like it.

She: Devika, you write so less these days….seldom share a real thought of yours...and the short poems that you write takes me places, but I reach no where….I loved, the latest “I shall choose…” at Certain Kind

Me: Thought, its all over for me….I don’t think these days….and I don’t write poems to take you anywhere.... (Me smiles)

She: stop this kidding....You are too lazy or you fear…

Me: I don’t disagree either way

She: And I always wanted to ask -- can’t you write those sensuous stuff..I had enjoyed some of your earlier writings...and you never published them

Me: ha! that was perhaps I myself was sensuous then...

She: No, seriously….i think a woman writer should never restrict herself….

Me: Yeah, I too think so….and as for me, I like a fine womanly sensuousness that comes in her writings….not those violent debauchery in the name of sensuousness…But well, now I can no longer place myself there….

She: May be you can refine those old writings and publish them

Me: I can -- not interested, though

She: But you love reading them?

Me: I do, especially those which come with a romantic nuance…
But now I have reached the stage in reading…where it’s the 'body of her writings' that appeals me -- NOT the 'writings of her body'....as someone said

She: You are a bit too much…sometimes

Me: I never asked you to munch me!

We ended that conversation there…..and then, it drifted to the characters of a movie we both have seen….and it went on to the next…I enjoy my time with her, as I love her. And I publish this for her, who sought anonymity for herself.

********

Photo: Portrait of Two Women, 1914; Diego Rivera:
Source: http://www.fbuch.com/cubism.htm


* I doubt if that my original thought...may be I read it somewhere....or may be its mine...

I shall choose...

I shall choose…

‘Never be foolish to grant woman her freedom,
or allow her the lenience of sharing the dais
to speak for herself and the marginalised
she should be in the margins,
be in the chains that her man carves,’ said they

‘let her be, simply be
she only seeks that harmless freedom
to love….not of the body but of the spirit-
allow her to be,’ he pleaded
I looked up to the sole voice,
the most familiar, the most compassionate,
a voice I’d listened, and chose to obey
yet so strange now, amidst the noisy crowd

‘NO, I shall live in the margins,
I choose to live in the margins...
if I be offered the freedom to choose
I choose to be in the chains they invent

from the margins I shall see
just see, the sun restore their days
and the moon transform their nights
as they redeem their lives
and their ancient amethyst dreams

my urge is only to see,
there isn’t any left to live or love
obsessed today I am of nothing
except the urge to see the life around me

grant me the kindness to live
here, in these margins, in these chains
and allow me the luxury to place myself
at the core of your heart, occasionally
to see your world, through my eyes
and to question the status quo
just for the fun of it!

to you whom I can ask,
I choose to ask only that

challenge my mind if you so wish
for it’s now grown elastic
and can stretch and bounce back
but spare my fragile heart,
that’s had many a zodiacal break!


think of it, why should you care
break it time and again...for, now I know
to fix it up...as it originally was’

**********

PS: This piece came out as a much longer one in the course of my vacation home....And the thoughts here are much older….years may be….and rewinded many times...though i never chose to write it even in my personal journal….but then, now it doesn’t seem to make a difference….Just took out stanzas from here and there…. Hope it makes some sense to you, the reader....

and by the way, my urge to live and to love is never gone beyond a moment in time...please don't ask me awkward questions! :)

Photo courtesy: as per original copyright at:
http://www.geographyofgrace.com/2006/02/the_cross_and_the_city_abandon.html

On a Nonsensical Note

On a Nonsensical Note

‘I want you to rain on me
I want you to shine on me’

remember you wrote it on
the cigarette case at the café,
the last cigarette still burning
between your fingers, and me
whiffing the uncurling smoke

for a long time I had that case
in my wallet, but in my teary
kisses in those uncertain days
the blue words turned pale
until I left it in some book

now torn and dusty may be,
I’ve never seen it in years

no, these words are not to
remind--that was our deal.
but it struck me the other day
when the doctor closed my file

does it rain in the barren lands, or
ever shine in cold, desolate fields….

but then, when you come back
to complain of the coldness in me
know, know that it was my deal
the coldness, my veil to abandon a
world that’s overbearing on me

if you still keep your warm
stay off……stay off, because
I may lose my cold
and turn haughty

and neither you nor me
will like it to be so…

**********

PS: I am just in my nonsensical stupor…A bad mood since some days, I can’t seem to get control of…this was the only way…..and I am in no mood to refine my words either….forgive me if I sound offensive.

Photo courtesy: as per original copyright at:
http://www.artinashes.com/Modern-Art-and-Funerals-information.php

Random, Yet Certain

if my affection for you is real
do I slay an other hand
whose only dream is you?

in sheer boredom
have I entered here
seeking a spark of joy
now, a fire glows in me
how do I douse it
with tears of someone
whose dreams and desires

borders my own

withered and weary
are my thoughts, today

yet, as we trace a
shared destiny in a
borderless world,
this flame of mine
shall glow in silence
and be lifted up for you
in moments of
uncertainty – so certain
and peaceful
is my affection for you,
as absolute as your vision

*********

Photo courtesy: as per original copyright at:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/72852787@N00/274084103

AN OLD POEM REVISITS

AN OLD POEM REVISITS

I have made up my mind
to live, forgetting them,
who went without a good bye,
and ignoring them, who pinch me
no end with their indifference
as with their fetid words…
only the sun and moon shall
now remain in my quiescent
skies, the endless stars and clouds,
may lend their charm, when I shall
visit you at day’s end, in your
unguarded moments, and leave

when the sound of rains
batter on your roofs…

remember that

happiness is not something

I seek or trade in but,

peace shall be…

not to many have I
closed my doors before,
but now my doors shall
remain closed until the white
hands of death shall knock…
when only the wily wind
shall enter to set my body
ablaze, and it shall be
a cold November….

***********

PS: This was written about 12 years ago… And I do not know, for some reason the lines came back to me last night... I have lost the book that I wrote it, hence words have been changed here and there… may be some lines have been added too…

Photo courtesy: mymillerphotos as per original copyright at:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/serendipitypeace/2078641763/

The Day Has Come

beneath the dormant sky
and a feral, burning sun
the city wilts,
the decrepit walls
wiped clear of all
flawed graffiti…

eyes filled
with anguish
the odious manipulators
now look within
to see their own faults,
to see that filth was within
and to see how their own
faithless factions
dupe them in all fronts
they shall now learn
to know that
the darkness in their eyes
shall not fill the fissures
and in the days light
no cracks remain
its only the
One Soul
that fills
you and me

and finally,

the day has come
when you and me shall
walk together into our
chosen destinies…and,
as the old white cross
sings its glory, freedom
shall be my gift
to you….

*********

PS: This is in a way a follow-up on:

http://devika-jyothi.blogspot.com/2008/12/day-may-come.html

Photo courtesy: Mrymerry as per original copyright at:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mrymerry/2902814003/